Chrysalis State of Being

I’ve been thinking about butterflies. A friend suggested that I reflect on transmutation from her observation of the changes she is seeing in me. When I asked her to say more, she responded ‘like a butterfly’. A few days later another friend posted a picture on Facebook of a beautiful butterfly in her hands.  Then I remembered what I thought I knew… that a caterpillar forms its chrysalis and then turns completely to liquid, growing into a butterfly. [Transmutation – the conversion of one element to another] I decided to look further and found some amazing time lapsed videos showing this process. It does look as though the caterpillar turns completely to liquid in that beautiful chrysalis. Investigating more, I looked at photographs with arrows and descriptions of the anatomy of a butterfly’s life cycle [metamorphosis — the process by which a butterfly physically develops which involves an abrupt change in the animal’s body structure through cell growth and differentiation]. I saw that the caterpillar really does have all of its flying ‘equipment’ as a caterpillar. It’s just not developed enough as a youngster in its morphological life to be of any use for flying. You have to crawl before you fly! What a relief to be reminded it’s all part of a bigger picture, a greater plan.

I’ve been feeling like I’m in a chrysalis state of being the last month or so. It seems like everything in my life has changed. Not the abrupt change obvious to the eye of an observer, but an internal change that can be seen by the heart of an observer.  A change that has caused me to be still, unable to crawl OR fly and not particularly comfortable.  In this liquid state, I thought, I have no form. On closer examination with the butterfly as my guide, I see that I have everything I need. I do have my wings, they just aren’t obvious here in my chrysalis. I couldn’t see them or sense their use when I was a caterpillar.

As a caterpillar I nourished myself with knowledge, tested stepping out on a branch, practiced my craft, shared my gifts in measured ways, knowing there was a greater expression of my being. In this chrysalis state I am changing to a new form. I am on hiatus — resting, taking a break — while my wings grow.  With faith that all is as it is meant to be and patience that metamorphosis cannot be rushed, I know that soon, soon, I will emerge and fly.

At the trailhead to Noonmark, Ausable Club, St. Huberts, Adirondack Mtns, NY

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